Silky, Crunchy, and Scrunchy Mamas

Who They Are and How They Raise Their Babies

The world is changing at a rapid pace. What was once considered the norm is now old school and no longer practiced.

Think about posting letters. 

Who does that anymore when there’s email, or texting? 

The same holds true for motherhood. 

Some mothers have a different stance about raising their children that differs from the practices of their mothers.

There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s just different, and constantly evolving to incorporate modern understanding of parenting and contemporary values. 

After all, what works for one person might not work for another. Mothers have the right to raise their children in a manner they deem to be fit, as long as they are looking out for the child’s best interest.

Most mothers do a tremendous amount of research on the best ways to raise a baby before they deliver, so expecting moms may have a pretty good idea of how they want to rear their newborn.

Along with their own values, beliefs, and personality, new moms also pull from the experience of how their mother raised them.

In common 21st century fashion, moms can fall into a number of different categories depending on how they aim to raise a little one. Three of these categories include “silky,” “crunchy,” and “scrunchy” mama. 

Don’t worry. 

None of them are insults. 

If these terms aren’t part of your vocabulary, here’s your chance to see whether you’d side with silky, crunchy, or scrunchy parenting styles.

Silky Mama

If you look up “silky mama” in the urban dictionary, you’ll find that a silky mama is one who prefers medicated hospital birth. She’s in favor of bottle feeding and part-time breastfeeding, as well as disposable diapers and crib sleeping.

A silky mama usually follows the advice of medical authority. Most of them had a hospitable birth. Although she is proud to be a mother, she works and relies on products for convenience and time management.

Most people view silky mamas as modern moms. One of the things that silky mamas take seriously is keeping their kids up to date on vaccines. 

Here are some of the reasons that some women love being silky mamas:

They feel that disposable diapers are easy. Some moms considered cloth diapers but changed their minds after they realized how often they went through diapers. Most of them understand that disposable diapers aren’t environmentally friendly and may contribute to diaper rash but enjoy not having to wash cloth diapers.

They don’t have time to make homemade baby food. Considering that silky mamas generally have jobs, they don’t always have time for DIY baby food. After doing it a few days or weeks, some moms opt for a break: pre-packaged foods. Some said jars and pouches were convenient for on-the-go, and that ready-to-eat food provided fantastic variety.

They feel that doctors are more educated than them. Since mothers want the best for their children, they feel that medical professionals know more about children's health than they do. They believe medical-degree holders are the only qualified authority to dispense valid advice. Naturally, many look to pediatricians for that authority. There are some alternatives, however: Asking a family member or Googling the issue.

They enjoy their sleep. Silky mamas believe that babies should sleep in their cribs, not with them. Raising a baby is no child’s play, and mothers have to sacrifice a lot to raise a baby. Any naps they can sneak in will be taken. They take getting sleep seriously and practice keeping the baby in its crib rather than bedside or in bed with them.

They think that breastfeeding doesn’t always work. Some silky mamas felt that the baby didn’t latch properly or she had a low supply. They also felt their newborn outright rejected the nipple and breast on occasion. To compensate, they supplemented with formula. Overall they felt the baby was happy with the change, and so were they in turn.

They love baby gear. If there’s one thing that all moms cherish when they have a baby, it’s being able to carry on with their day and not worry about being a mom twenty-four-seven. Silky mamas love all the baby gear such as play gyms, swings, bouncers and walkers. Those things allow the kids to occupy themselves while mom makes dinner or puts her feet up to watch TV.

Crunchy Mama

Many people would say that a crunchy mama is the opposite of a silky one. Most crunchy mamas are on a mission to acquire more information. 

The general definition that pertains to crunchy mamas is that they are environmental, health and socially conscious. Crunchy mamas care so much about their families that they are constantly questioning the status quo.

That’s a good thing.

If you’re a crunchy mama, you believe that various approaches to problems exist and you don’t feel compelled to stick with only one approach. Being a crunchy mom is about being flexible and discovering why things happen and determining the root cause of the problem.

The best way to describe a crunchy mama is a woman who is on a journey to find out the best possible means to care for her family.

Here are some of the traits affiliated with a crunchy mama.

Most of them gave birth at home by choice, with a midwife or a doula. They prefer that their children do homeschooling, as opposed to attending a public or private school. Crunchy mamas grow their food as much as possible and buy the rest from health food stores or farmer’s markets. They are usually vegan or vegetarian and choose not to use birth control. Some of the other things that most of them do is not have a television but opt for books. They might not use shampoo but opt for sea salt.

Crunchy mamas are also known as Granola, Hippie, Natural or Earth mama. 

       Here are some of the ways to identify being a crunchy mama.

  • You haven’t slept with your husband alone in your bed since the child’s birth
  • You’ve got a chicken coop in the backyard
  • Finding raw milk is like discovering hidden treasure to you
  • Placenta recipes are your specialty
  • All the diets in the house are gluten-free and Paleo
  • You believe in making, washing and only using cloth diapers
  • You own a Prius, not a minivan
  • The children aren’t vaccinated and never will be
  • You make use of a menstrual cup
  • Coconut oil and breast milk are the holy grail for everything
  • You can make just about anything

Although many mothers took great pride in being crunchy mamas, they also admitted that it has uphill battles. Here are some of the issues with being a crunchy mama.

They love their children so much that they want them by their side all the time. That includes at night. As you can imagine, that means less space in the bed for mom and dad, as well as having to deal with a crying baby.

Think about washing cloth diapers all the time. That’s a hassle on its own. Being a crunchy mama also means that you try to make all the things yourself. Whether its food or anything else that you need, you’re constantly trying to make things from scratch. That requires effort and time - something that most mothers can’t afford to waste.

Then there’s the issue of having your children study from home and having them around all the time. Mothers love their children and can’t get enough of them. That doesn’t mean they don’t want to take a break for a few hours and have some alone time. Crunchy mamas have their children around all the time. 

Scrunchy Mama

Women who are uncertain about whether to be a silky or crunchy mama have a third alternative. It’s called being a scrunchy mama.

The easiest way to describe a scrunchy mama is that she is a mixture of silky and crunchy mama. Now, you no longer have to choose between one or the other. You can take traits of a silky mama and combine it with a crunchy mama.

 Scrunchy mamas practice a bit of both. So which traits do you use from the different moms?

You can choose. That’s the best part.

A scrunchy mama might formula feed and have a hospital birth and vaccinate her kids but also use cloth diapers and produce her own baby food. If you can’t decide between silky or crunchy, maybe the best option for you is to be a scrunchy mama.

Let’s get into the specifics and find out what’s so great about being a scrunchy mama.

You get the best of both worlds. The main perk is that you can scrutinize both sides and decide what works best for your circumstances.

There’s no guilt regarding organic foods. Feeding your family the best and healthiest foods is something that most moms strive for but don’t do all the time due to budget. Organic foods are expensive so some moms can’t buy it all the time. They purchase it when it’s on sale or to spoil the family once in a while. When the budget doesn’t permit organic foods, mom doesn’t feel guilty about not providing only the best.

The baby gets fed either way. The most important thing for most mothers is that their child is fed and healthy. They might disagree about the methods to feed the child, but they agree about the result. If breastfeeding works for you only sometimes, then you can replace it with a formula on some days or go with it altogether.

Compromising is your best quality. Scrunchy mamas always weigh the pros against the cons. They’re always looking to find the most suitable answer for their family, and if one isn’t available immediately, they settle for common ground.

No vaccination drama. Considering that most schools require a vaccination shot for entry, your kids have had their shots. This is one area where you don’t have to weigh the pros against the cons. 

The sleeping arrangements suit everyone. You no longer have to settle for only one option when you’re a scrunchy mama. If you feel one night that you want the child to sleep in bed with you and not the next night, you have those options available. The child might also want a break from the parents every now and again, so it works well for everyone.

You’ll encourage the kids to think for themselves. One of the things that tend to happen when you’re a silky or a crunchy mama is that you teach your kids to follow the same lifestyle. What if they don’t agree with your way and want to raise their kids differently? A key benefit of being a scrunchy mama is that you teach your kids to evaluate both sides and make an informed decision based on what’s best for them.

Which Mama To Be

As with most things in life, there is no one-size-fits-all answer. The type of mom that you want to depend on what you believe, your circumstances and the way you want your children to raise theirs.

Each of the three categories contains pros and cons. Nobody can tell you what you should or shouldn’t do, so it’s best to examine your situation and decide what’s best for everyone. 

If being a regular mom wasn’t difficult enough, these days mothers have to add another decision to motherhood - what type of a mother to be.

If all of that is too much to think about, then being a scrunchy mama might sound good. After all, it allows you to  just be you without worrying about which side you’re on. 

All that said: 

Every mom has their own opinion on breastfeeding and it shows in each of the mom archetypes above. To help you decide for yourself, read below for 15 benefits of breastfeeding you might not know about...

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About the Author Barbara Davis

Hey there, I'm Barbara Davis, founder and editor in chief here at Mom Trusted Choice. Motherhood is hard work, but it’s also full of surprises and laughter. With every passing month, the joy and excitement keep getting bigger and bigger. The journey never ends, and that’s what I love about it the most and want to share with all of you.

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